It makes me ill

I hate talking about the day she had surrounded by a bunch of assholes. I hate that she keeps talking about these people that should be cut from her life. I hate it when she doesn't give me her full attention when I call her. I hate how she won't call any of the people that I've told her to call. I have that she's going out of her way to be bored out-of-her-mind. I hate how she does wtf she wants and doesn't care about anyone else's feelings.

I hate how she thinks after 2 drinks I need treatment. I hate how I can't remember the last birthday I spent with her. I hate it that my damn family can't get along. I hate how I really don't know my family r/t the former but can explain their behavior beautifully. I hate how she tells me what to do when she never followed it. I hate how she thinks I'm irrational and angry.

But most of all I hate how much I resemble her and she's not even here.